Showing posts with label Fat. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Fat. Show all posts

Saturday, September 1, 2007

(Ir)responsible fattie

For those of you who have known me (in person)for any amount of time knows that I am fat. Not chubby, not big, plain old fat. I was a siz 12 at the age of twelve and the smallest i've been in the last 5 years is a 22. I have lost weight and gained it back more times then I can count.

Instead of doing anything about it, I would get depressed and stuff myself full of junk. Well, I was watching Oprah. She had Dr. Oz on again and this time I paid attention. The majority of my weight is in my belly, which makes the risk of heart attack or disease higher. I don't want to have a heart attack. I don't want my kidneys to fail.

In addition to the obvious health issues, I am miserable all the time. I am always tired, always upset. I thought it was just because my work hours changed, and I was getting up earlier. It's been 2 months. I am still always tired. I have for the past two months waking up early and walking for at least 20 minutes, but it isn't everyday and it has gotten to be as little as two times a week.

I had no motivation. I still struggle with it. But Dr. Oz says you just sometimes have to do it before the motivation comes. So I am determined to walk at least four times a week. I have also cut fast food out. Fast food should not be as convenient as it is. I love convenience. But this is when I kinda realized that my life shouldn't be all convenience. I should have to struggle. I have been reading a lot of articles about food and what foods will help me change my habits and lifestyle.

i have to say some of my motivation to change came from my new pal Walt. He has been brave in sharing his weight and achievements. He posted a before and after picture awhile ago and he looks amazing. I am so glad we met through QCast. I know that it can be done, I just need to work for it.

Another thing that kinda jilted my naive self was a post Rob made on the Daily Purge blog. I know Rob wasn't out to hurt anyones' feelings. He just kinda proved to me that being fat is not only unhealthy, but is humiliating. This picture is "funny" because its a question about diets and the "fat" girl couldn't answer it.

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This girl looks so much like me, only alittle younger. This image is burned in my brain. I almost feel like printing it out and hanging it on my fridge.

So what I need to do is be responsible for myself. I have decided that this here blog will be my go to when I need to vent the frustrations, when I do something well. And the part I dread...the food diary. I have read a few places that you are less likely to eat crap when you have to write it down. So my darling readers will have the joy of knowing everything I eat. Just a warning, I am a creature of habit so I will have probably the same thing for days in a row. i also promise that I will not lie. No point too.

Ok...it starts today! September 1, 2007!

I ate:

Cottage cheese and pineapple
Veggie stir-fry with rice
a 100 calorie bag of grasshopper cookies
half a can of Monster coffee drink
34 oz of water
6" veggie sub from Submarina