The A-Z Music I Love, C is for Coldplay

Now before anyone groans, let me explain. I am actually not a huge fan of Coldplay; however, I am a huge fan of one of their songs.

Back before Derek and I were married...hell before we lived in the same country, Derek sent me the CD single of this song as a gift. I am not sentimental about material items; however, I still have this CD packed away and will never get rid of it. This song reminds me of falling in love, how exciting it was to have someone adore you, and it reminds me of possibility.

On and on from the moment I wake,

To the moment I sleep,

I'll be there by your side,

Just you try and stop me,

I'll be waiting in line,

Just to see if you care.

Did she want me to change?

But I change for good.

And I want you to know.

But you always get your way,

I wanted to say,

Don't you Shiver? Shiver, Shiver

I'll always be waiting for you,

So you know how much I need ya,

But you never even see me, do you?

And this is my final chance of getting you.

12/16/09

Chrima 2005

Gearing up for Chrima has got me running through the normal (for me) emotions. Of course, The guilt, stress, excitement, happiness, nerves, all kick in the week before Thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving dinner was a huge success, but that is easy when there are only two of us. Derek put up the chrima decorations as he has in years past. I don't think either of us are feeling it this year. Derek's annoyance at putting up the tree was very apparent. I still haven't decorated out first tree (the 3ft fake tree that was our first tree when we got married) and I haven't had the motivation to do so. I can't shake the funk I have been in, although I have been trying.

I am done chrima shopping, was done rather quickly. With money being as tight as it is, I think I did rather well and only had one mishap with Amazon that was corrected quickly. My mother received their gift box and we received hers. It made me sad cause I haven't had a chrima with my mom in six years. I don't dare cry about it to Derek as he hasn't had a holiday with his parents either. Derek is supposed to fly to London next year to see his grandfather. I don't know if Derek has filtered in his head that this may be the last time he sees him. That makes me sad. I wish I could get him over there more often, it's just so expensive.

On the good side, I will get to spend some time with Wes, Christian, Frank, and Brian this weekend. The 2nd annual cookie party where we won't really bake cookies hahaha! These boys, although I don't get to talk to or see them as much as I'd like, mean the world to me. Love them tons! Derek does too, even though Christian sometimes makes him nervous with this "it's all the same in the dark" talk. hahah! Sorry Derek.

Then chrima eve we will be having breakfast for dinner and some fun times with April, Doug, and her parents. April came over on Saturday and we just talked for hours. It's weird to think that April and I have been friends for almost 25 years. I wish I saw her more often. I hope she likes her pressies for chrima.

As it stands right now, I have 1,448 chrima songs left to listen to. My pal Walt sent me about 3,000 chrima songs and plus the 300 or so I had, I have been listening to 60-150 songs a day. At one point, the ipod decided I needed to hear Frosty the snowman 9 ways in a row. It made me giggle. i think Walt is down to 700 to listen to, so we are racing to the finish line. In order for me to finish by Chrima, I have to listen to 160 songs a day. I may make it by new years :)

We have received so many chrima cards and you know what, I love these end of the year news letters. i may never meet some of these folks in person, but I love that they sent them. It gives Derek and I a little insight to who listens to S&T. Great people, I will have you know. I am so very thankful for them. Derek said he wanted to do one of the news letters next year. I guess that means we actually have to do stuff.

We did a few things this year, Ricky and TWSS were here for a couple days, Derek and I participated in pride 48, Our first trip to Vegas with the in-laws, Derek and I went to Gay Days at Disneyland, We had dinner with Wes, Tim, and Ron, and we had our first podcast anniversary.

2010 is right around the corner, and Derek and I are focusing on finances and our health. Our goal is to be in ID by the time I am 35, homeowners at 37, and adopt a child by 40. I'll be 32 in May. here's hoping these procrastinating, lazy, unorganized people can do it. haha!

Since I may not post until after the new year, I hope my friends and family out there have a great chrima and 2010 brings you nothing but joy and love.

Paypal, Michael Jackson, and Six Years

I know the majority of my blog readers listen to Stars & Tartans, so this story may be a repeat. Those of you who don't well it will be new to you.

Derek and I are trying to be a little less spendy these days because we would like to purchase our own home, adopt a baby or two, and grow old. The biggest obstacle isn't so much debt, it's putting the money away. So we, derek especially, tried to not spend as much and get some money put away. Derek asked me to go over the bank account balance with him and I see that both our checking and savings account had been wiped out. With all the NSF fees, our account was $2,ooo overdrawn.

Turns out, someone had hacked my email account, obtained my ebay password, and purchased a macbook and used my paypal account to pay for it. So for three weeks, we had to wait for paypal to complete their investigation so we could get our money back. And although the people that work for paypal were sympathetic and nice, no one seemed to really know what was going on and how long I had to wait. It was also frustrating that the seller of the computer was emailing me. Hey all you ebay sellers. If your buyer tells you that another ebay account is going to contact you and gives you an address that paypal does not provide to you, maybe you shouldn't go through with the transaction. I'm just saying.

So Michael Jackson. I loved Michael Jackson when I was a child into my teenage years. Around 1991 my musical tastes changed as grunge entered my life, but I still secretly enjoyed MJ. I have a lot of memories that have an MJ soundtrack. My sister and I used to sing man in the mirror with her boyfriend's kids during our living room performances. Listening to Bad as I played with my new hula hoop on Christmas morning. Singing The Way You Make Me Feel with Joe at work because it annoyed William. My sister singing Black or White and dancing like Michael. I also remember Robbie singing Black or White in the front yard. I learned to tell time because of Thriller.

Thriller scared me. I was five, maybe six when it started playing on MTV. My mom and dad thought that it would be good to have me watch the making of Thriller so I could see that it was pretend and I wouldn't be so scared. Back then, bedtime was 7pm. Just as they were to play thriller, I magically could tell time and said said it's my bed time, I can't watch anymore. I don't think I was brave enough to watch it until the 4th grade.

I watched the memorial on TV and cried the whole time. I feel like a piece of my childhood is gone. But I am very thankful for my memories. Regardless of what anyone's opinion is, MJ was a force in our history and was the best entertainer and will be missed. I hope his children will grow up to be great and people will let them be.

On the 7th, was Derek and my 6th anniversary. I have found that as time goes by, I like Derek more. Does that make sense? I never didn't like him, I am finding that no matter what a pain in my ass he can be, I like having him around and actually get a little sad when he's not. So i guess I will keep him around for another year. Maybe next year I will trade him in :P.

Other than that, I have been working on being more physically active. I went from only being able to walk for 15, 20 minutes to walking for an hour. I have been a little more aware of what i am eating. I'm very instant gratification and would give up if I had no results after a week. This time, I have been a little more patience and have seen results after a month. I am going to continue because I feel better.

Here is a Michael Jackson song I love, a Song of the Day if you will.

The good stuff

I really should have updated this when it happened, but I couldn't find the motivation to write it out. Plus when I do write, I tend to focus on the negative and I did not want to loose my good mood since they are sometimes far between.

So hopefully I can remember everything that happened this week.

-Monday-
This was a pretty big deal for our company. Warren Buffett who owns (?) Berkshire Hathaway, GEICO's parent company, was coming to our office since we had the highest something. He does it every year, but it is normally an office back east that has the highest something. This is a pretty big deal. After his speech to the higher ups, he took pictures with everyone in the building, all 1500 of us. I didn't get to shake his had or anything, but the 8 of us got our picture taken with him and the CEO of GEICO. So Mr. Buffett puts his arms around two of my co-workers and Mr. Nicely (CEO) puts his arm around me, gives me a squeeze, asks how I am. And there were three (I think) photographers walking back and forth taking pictures. And as silly as it sounds, I wasn't sure where to look, so I am pretty sure I will have a dumb look on my face. Afterwards, Mr. Buffett patted me on the back as he walked by. I thought it was cool. And they gave us ice cream afterwards. Can't beat that.

-Tuesday-
I have been trying to make an effort to stay in a better mood at work. It's hard when I go in all tired and really bored. But I am so very thankful I have my job so I need to make the best of what I am blessed to have. This became so much easier when my pal Sarah wrapped her arms around me and scared me half to death! She is back from maternity leave and was coming to days! I am so happy because Sarah feels like she could be a sister from another mother. She makes me smile like no other. I may not be the sappy sort, but I love it when she tells me I'm adorable and she loves me. I adore her, and her children are so beautiful. I think she is one of the few girls who hasn't had an agenda. I use agenda for lack of a better term. I don't bond with females well at all. But Sarah and I have a bond that I hold near and dear to my heart. She's a beautiful girl!

-Wednesday-
I got to do our taxes! Now I know Tax time isn't fun time for most. Well, Derek and I don't own anything and we're poor by California standards, We normally get a fat refund. This year was more than expected. When I get the final numbers, I felt like a load lifted off my shoulders. After we get the money, the credit cards will be paid off, Both Derek and I can get our eyes checked, take the car in, new phone for Derek and I, and finance the trip to Vegas with the in-laws. Both Derek and I hugged and both felt some relief. It will rule to see clearly again heh!

-Thursday-
Derek and I went To Grossmont to look around, did a little shopping, saw Last Chance Harvey (eh), then came home and did podcasting junk. Not a whole lot, but was so fun. A Good day for sure.

-Friday-
Just a good day at work with my work husband that consisted of way too much caffeine. I was deleting things off my computer and found a folder that had Phreddy's birthday video in it. It made me cry. Not because I was sad, but because I was really grateful that I met him in person, and his beautiful family. He's good people. And now I am watching Kevin Smith and texting that slut Christian whose about to gay it up haha!

So to add to this long ass post, this song is hot, and I love this video.

Thanksgiving countdown

I am watching a Thanksgiving special on the food network. I always thought you should toast the bread you use, huh. Tyler Florence didn't toast the sourdough cubes. Sorry, that's a little random.

So this will be my first Thanksgiving as a vegetarian. I will admit that a part of me is a little sad because I always associated Thanksgiving with the meal. So this will be a challenge. I am making Derek a turkey breast, but everything else will be vegetarian. Sage and mushroom stuffing, Green beans, potato au gratin, and i have "chicken" breasts that I really like that I am pretty confident they will be very tast smothered in gravy. Plus the ceremonial pickles and olives. My mom would always put out the bread and butter pickles and black olives while she cooked to keep the kids busy. So I continue it because, well because I am :)

What dishes do you all have?

So I am working on getting over a cold or the flu. I had planned on Christmas shopping last week, but I was in a NyQuil coma for the most part. So I am starting now. I am also starting on my Christmas cards. I love sending Christmas cards. So if you are a regular reader of my blog and I don't have your address, email me at missxomisery@aol.com.

So Derek and I are two weeks into the podcast and it is going pretty well. Derek is pretty excited about how many comments we've gotten on the blog and how many followers. It has been a lot of fun to brain storm with him. I don't say it enough because I try not to be overly mushy, but he really is a good guy. So enough of that hehe!

The Johnstons Make a Podcast

After a lot of consideration and thought (and a ton of encouragement from friends), Derek and I have decided to start our own podcast. We will be doing a personal journal style podcast about what we have going on in our lives and what we're interested in. We are both very excited about it and hope to have the ball rolling in the next week or so.

I think this will be a good opportunity for my pals out there in podcast land to get to know Derek and Derek to mingle with the lot of you.

In the mean time, we have a website up, that's kind of bare right now, but we'll be working on it. It is located here starsandtartan.com

Here's to new starts and junk and stuff.

Song of the Day 10/01/08 and an update

Frozen, by Madonna

You only see what your eyes want to see
How can life be what you want it to be
You're frozen
When your heart's not open

You're so consumed with how much you get
You waste your time with hate and regret
You're broken
When your heart's not open

First, I want to send a huge hug to my darling Kim Beaver. I hope your father recovers quickly.

Yesterday we had a BBQ for my supe who is going to another department on the 10th. I'm sadzies because he is a really cool guy. He's moving on to better things and I wish him the best. I'm gonna miss him being around.

I am leaving for ID a week from tomorrow. My best pal April and her boyfriend Doug are going to stay here with Maggie while Derek and I are gone. We are actually going to her house on Saturday for a BBQ. hopefully it won't be so hot. Today was 101 degrees and I thought I was going to die. Come on fall!

Derek got a well deserved raise and we are hoping it will be on the next paycheck. I love when Derek gets all assertive and sticks up for himself. His boss is still a nozzle, but at least Derek is paid more to tolerate him.

I want a pumpkin spice frappachino. That sounds so good right now! Ok bye.

Up too early

So Derek finally comes to bed at 2:45am. He tosses and turns to get comfortable, three minutes later gets up to go to the bathroom and tosses and turns again. This goes on for the next 15 minutes because Derek is mental! He has some deep seeded fear that he will piss himself while he sleeps or something. And this isn't the first time his up and down for 20 minutes has kept me awake. So I have been awake since 2:45am. (which is a good Elliott Smith song)

Anyways. I did get somethings done this morning. I purchased some birthday pressies for Dad. Read up on all the blogs I have let slip over the week, updated the iTunes, and started to listen to the 30 plus podcasts that have built up since Wednesday.

I have a new obsession. I have always been intrigued by Mediums and ghost hunting and junk. There are two shows I LOVE on the A&E's. The First one is Paranormal State and the second is Psychic Kids. The common thread on these two shows is Chip Coffey. Something about him is interesting and certainly entertaining. And he looks a little like Big Fatty, which I am listening to out of order, I just realized.



WMBYS' 50th show is going to be recorded on Tuesday. i think that is so exciting. I also get to be a guest on PIMC's 69th episode with my boyfriend Taylor, Taffy, Rodan, Tom, and someone else. So that will be fun.

Can you tell that I am just talking to take up time? I wonder what time Starbucks opens on Sundays. I will for sure need it.

Did I mention that I love Eddie Izzard?

Amazon Wish Lists and My "dad" was in a movie

So with our podcast, it became a running joke that people should buy things off our Amazon wish lists. Little did we know people would actually buy things for us. It is all very sweet and flattering, I hope people know it's not mandatory and it won't make or break us. the list has been helpful to a few of my pals for my birthday that is coming up at the end of the month. My pal Keela told me to stop buying myself things. I proudly stated, I'm not, I just have some great pals :)

I need to send special thank yous out to my gay german boyfriend Michael in STGT. I received my new measuring spoons yesterday! Phreddy, I have annoyed people at work with my random Air Supply solos. And of course, my darling Holly who has been very generous with my birthday pressies. I love that girl.

So this week on some TV network, they have been playing Tom Hanks movies. I watched Cast Away on Saturday and Forest Gump on Sunday. I remembered that Fatty Daddy (big fatty to the rest of you) saying he was an extra in the movie as one of the reporters and He got his face up in that camera. I was telling the husband that and he was like no way. So when I see these big sideburns jogging behind Tom Hanks I start laughing and Derek said holy shit that is Big Fatty and starts singing the haming it up song from the LFC (which he only knows the haming it up with big fatty line) Was very amusing.

Ok, I need to go get in the shower and head to work. I just needed to remember to say thank you and giggle at my "dad" being famous. well, kinda.

Nessa the hag...

Ok, so this is my bitch post. I need to vent!

Now, I wake up at 3:45 am 5 days a week, I get up, I work out for 30 minutes, I cook breakfast for Derek and I, and I do the dishes.

Now Derek works nights, so his breakfast is in the fridge when he wakes up. He also has lunch made when he comes home on his break, and has dinner waiting when he comes home. I would say this is true 90% of the time because some days, I am too tired to make dinner sometimes.

Part of our deal is that since I do cook and clean in the morning that derek will make my lunch for work and put the dishes away. Today is like the 3rd day this week that the dishes weren't put away and the ice packs i need for my lunch bag were not in the freezer. On top of that, there was coffee spilled on the counters, food from his dinner left in the sink, his uniform left in a pile in the dining room, two sodas that he drank half of left in various places, the oven light left on, all the fans left on, the DVR and cable box left on, and trash on the floor. Now this probably wouldn't have been a big deal except it's the 3rd time this week I have woken up to a dirty house that was otherwise clean when I went to bed.

Now I don't expect him to scrub the house down everyday, but come on! trash on the floor, the clothes, the spilled coffee! COME ON NOW!

Good thing I woke up early today so I had time to semi-clean up the mess.

Now I am off to shower and face another fun exciting day at the geicos.


OH!!!

Michael!!!

Congratulations on being named the official Bruce!!! I am excited for you and look forward to stories of Nemo adventures :)

a tough patch, i hope

So...

Yesterday Derek and I discussed separating. A very hard conversation to have. The truth of the matter is we haven't been happy for awhile. It was like we were both trying really hard to meet the same goal, but in different places. Lack of communication basically. So we have decided that we will try very hard to communicate better and to do things together. If things don't feel better by February, well we'll discuss it when the time comes.

It's very scary. I love Derek very much, and he loves me but we almost live as roommates. It's not making for a healthy marriage you know. So were gonna try. really hard. Cause if it doesn't work, I don't know what i'll do.

Walt, you'll have to clean out your comic book room heh. kidding of course.

I feel better today. kind of optomistic. Still very scared.

Food for today:
Onion and mushroom omlette
yogurt
grapes
carrotts
turkey sammie with some cheddar harvet sun chips
Whole wheat pasta with zuchinni and portobello mushroom sausage
scoop of ice cream
1 diet cream soda
1 diet coke
66 oz of water